Brave Love & Self Care

Episode 60: Brave Love & Self Care with Alexis Asbe

Would you ever treat an employee the way you treat yourself? Most of us are pretty rough on ourselves and we don’t take the time for self care because it feels like we have a million other things to do. Here’s the thing though, there is a very good reason why airlines tell you to put your own oxygen mask on first before assisting others. You are no help to anyone if you’re unconscious from lack of oxygen. The same thing applies to business and today you’ll hear from Alexis Asbe about the importance of self care and how to fit it into your busy schedule.

or access the episode here!

10 Ways To Plow Through Your List

Do you have an overwhelming list of things you need to do?

Me too! (I always have a list!  Ha!)

Here is my top 10 ways to plow through your wedding to do list:

1. Never say: “I can’t.” “Altar” your thinking. (Sorry. I can’t help being a goof ball sometimes.)

2. Focus on having fun. (If it’s not fun – don’t do it.)

3. Don’t center your attention on what you don’t know, concentrate on what you love.

4. Write your “goals list” on paper with dates of completion.

5. Ask for help.  (Remember, you are not alone. You are a team.)

6. Be open to new ideas and suggestions.

7. Truly enjoy each moment while on this journey.  (After all you are getting married; cherish this season.)

8. Celebrate you and your loves’ progress daily.

9. Hang around with fun people who want the best for you.

10. Stop talking about what you need to do, and START. Take action!

These are some ideas that help me daily.

Tell me, what is on your list?

Let me know what you may be stuck on or need help with.  I love feedback and suggestions. Thank you!

And please share this list with your friends and followers on Facebook and Pinterest…

Peace, love and plowing through my list…

Ally

Are You Stuck?

Do you have days when you want to wear the outfit on the left and other days you would choose the dress on the right?

Do you struggle with making decisions when both choices appeal to different parts of you?

Do you like lots of different things but can’t decide which to choose?

Don’t panic, there are many of us that feel your pain and find ourselves stuck in the land of indecision!

When making decisions regarding your wedding ask yourself these questions:

  1. How do I feel in my body about this decision? (Here is a little tip: put your dominant hand on your navel, close your eyes and listen to/feel your body. Where may you feel tense or uncomfortable which the choice at hand?
  2. Do I love this _________ (dress, shoes, cake, location, etc.)?
  3. Can I live with this decision?

If you feel uncomfortable in any part of your body; stop, breathe and walk away. Take some time in silence and ask that part of your body, “what is going on?” Then listen to it! Your next two answers should be a big fat YES! If not, walk away!

Do not start freak out and start asking everyone else what they think. When you ask other people to give you their opinion, it is just their opinion and personal views. It may not be right for you. I repeat, it may not be right for you and they are not you! You are uniquely different. You are not ordinary in any way. You are special and there is no one exactly like you. Give yourself plenty of time and freedom to make decisions. Never choose one thing because you are afraid of the other. Rushing or being put under pressure from others only zaps your creative energy and can distract you from your true self awareness. If you need support, get some. Asking for support is completely different than asking someone else to make decisions. Your ideal support team sounds like this, “Listen to heart and do what you think is best.” Another good form of support from your posse, would be, “Trust your gut feeling.”

Give yourself some time to breathe, rest and feel at peace before you start looking again. Do not be in a hurry to make major decisions.

Here is a little shout out to all of you that are conflicted…(this is also a great suggestion for: health, life, work, “men” or just about anything you would need to make a decision about). You got this! Breathe, relax and repeat!

Peace, Love and My name is, “Conflicted” and I am addicted to supporting you.

Ally

Why Screaming Girls Have Benefits + A Recipe for CALM

Here’s a glimpse into how a typical conversation I have with myself goes some days…

I don’t want to write today.
Just start…
No.
But…I want to go outside.
No you don’t.
I want to work out.
That’s lame, you are just avoiding writing. Sit your ass down and just start.
Deep breath…
That’s it, quiet your mind.
Breathe.
More breathing.
Come on, you’re NOT BREATHING right!
Efffff…
Okay.
There are teenage girls in my hot tub screaming.
Do all teenage girls have to scream constantly?
The sound of squealing girls bugs the sh*t out of me.
Boys don’t squeal. (Insert guilt… comparing mom thought)
Start breathing again.

This is a very unattractive teenage girl quality. If I were a teenage boy, I would definitely avoid this and zone out on video games. (ahhh…a bit of revelation – I must be starting to breathe!)

Two questions:

  1. Why are they in my hot tub in the middle of the day, don’t they have a list of crap to do?
  2. Why does it sound like someone is being killed every 2 minutes?

After investigating if there is a possible murder and confirming that, in fact, one has died, I close the door to my office to buffer the screeching and find myself with a smile.

I realize that their squealing is JOY: countless emotions, thoughts and feelings, leaking out through their beautiful, hormone-ridden bodies, as if some one has taken a soda bottle and shaken it up and out through the top the bubbling soda sprays everywhere.

There is joy spraying everywhere.

God forbid it should spray all over my home, into my heart and infuse everyone with reckless effervescent ridiculous happiness… This would be just awful (yes, please sense the sarcasm).

I quickly realize that I want this joy and I’m glad they chose to share. So, my friends, I choose to share something that makes me pretty joyful myself: my favorite nighttime drink ritual! I promise There is no squealing, breathing, or murder involved.

Peace, love and CALM…

A.

CALM: A Calcium and Magnesium Nighttime Cocktail

I love this stuff. I have a hard time sleeping generally, and since I am an “older” mom and have fatigue, I need more magnesium and calcium because I hear old chicks don’t get enough calcium. And since I’m a mother, naturally I have stress which causes magnesium deficiency (add to the list of hazards of working, exercising, and being a wife and mother). I originally heard of this natural CALM mix in Dr. Junger’s book, CLEAN when I was doing a detox—which, by the way, I highly recommend. And while we are on the subject of detoxing, it also makes you poop really big. (Yup, I said it and EVERYONE POOPS — read the book.)

Here’s the gist:
“Natural Calm is the solution to both restoring a healthy magnesium level and balancing your calcium intake—the result of which is natural stress relief.” You can read the long story here.

Apparently 80% of American men do not have healthy magnesium levels and 70% of us American women do not have healthy magnesium levels. So make you and your love a little nighttime cocktail. Most people drink it straight, as it doesn’t taste that bad, but I fancy it up a little… because you know I like it fancy!

What you need:

1–3 teaspoons of CALM – you can get it here or at most health food stores.
8 ounce Glass of Ice Water
¼ cup Liquid Gold (lemon ginger juice recipe)
3–5 drops Organic Liquid Stevia (to taste)

Prep:
Stir 1–3 teaspoons of CALM into ice water until dissolved.
Add Liquid Gold and Stevia and stir until mixed well.
Serve and enjoy.

Side action:
It helps relax you.
You may want a little action.
Add more Liquid Gold if you like more lemony – it’s good for you.

What’s playin’ in the background:
“Say Hello 2 Heaven” — Temple of the Dog
“Detox” — Sublime